


You Don't Want to Dance, But You Do Want to Wrestle

by Gang_Aft_Agley



Series: Tumblr Fics [2]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Beka will have none of it, Fake Dating, Gen, M/M, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Tumblr Prompt, man from uncle reference, or at least attempted fake dating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:21:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23191570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gang_Aft_Agley/pseuds/Gang_Aft_Agley
Summary: Yuri's Angels are getting out of hand, so Yurio hatches a plan to deal with them.Beka refuses to cooperate
Relationships: Otabek Altin/Yuri Plisetsky
Series: Tumblr Fics [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1667320
Comments: 2
Kudos: 53





	You Don't Want to Dance, But You Do Want to Wrestle

**Author's Note:**

  * For [silentawe](https://archiveofourown.org/users/silentawe/gifts).



Theoretically, a loss at the Grand Prix finals (especially to Katsudon, dammit) should have made Yuri Plisetsky’s nutty fangirls back off a bit.

Theoretically.

In reality, they did not. Nope. Not at ALL. Quite the opposite, actually. Now that he was well on his way to being taller than Victor (stupid growth spurt), “Yuri’s Angels” were getting even more rabid.

This shit never happened to Georgi or to Katsudon. It _did_ happen to J.J., but like hell he was going to _him_ for advice on how to handle crazed groupies.

Although … it _used_ to happen to Victor. Like, a _lot_. But while he still had plenty of fans, they weren’t nearly so … smothery. 

In fact, they had backed way the fuck off … right after he and the piglet started dating, and they’d beat a full-on retreat once the two had exchanged rings. Although Katsudon had gotten hate mail for taking Victor off the market, but whatever. And the stupid, obnoxious _J.J. Girls_ had gotten a lot more respectful once Isabella appeared on the scene.

So, plan. Good. This would totally work.

“You’re my new boyfriend. Congratulations,” he announced over Skype, before even saying hello.

Otabek choked.

“ _What?”_ he gasped, wiping coffee off of his screen after the epic spit-take the unexpected announcement had prompted.

Yurio scowled.

“My groupies are becoming annoying again. Since you won’t always be there on a motorcycle to save me, I need a better way of driving them off. Getting a boyfriend worked pretty well for Victor, and getting engaged did so for J.J.”

Otabek raised one eyebrow.

“You wouldn’t actually have to _be_ my boyfriend, okay? Just … pretend in public, sometimes. Selfies and stuff. You know, what Victor and Katsudon do, but not as gushy and gross.”

Otabek considered this, then pursed his lips.

“No.”

Yurio saw red briefly, which was weird, because the rejection of a _fake_ relationship (even from his best/only friend) shouldn’t actually _hurt_.

“Why not?”

“Yura, you are _sixteen_.”

Yurio crossed his arms and pouted.

“So? We wouldn’t be _doing_ anything.”

Otabek pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled loudly.

“Yeah, but the point of the exercise is for people to _think_ we are. If I wouldn’t date a sixteen-year-old for real, I’m not pretending to do so. Not even one as adorable as you.”

Now it was Yurio’s turn to consider the situation.

“So … when I’m eighteen, you’d pretend to date me, if I still needed the help?”

Otabek smiled. It was sweet … and a little sad, which was odd.

“No, Yuratchka. When you turn eighteen, I’d date you for real. No pretending.”

The idea was … strangely pleasing. Yuri flushed a bit.

“Fine, you have a deal. No take-backs. So, did you hear about Mickey’s freakout over Sara’s latest boyfriend?”

**Author's Note:**

> Title taken from the 2015 "The Man from U.N.C.L.E." movie.
> 
> Originally based on a tumblr prompt silentawe sent me in March, 2017 [here.](https://oft-goes-awry.tumblr.com/post/158291868543/fake-datingrelationship)


End file.
